Zac Attack!

Ok.

So, I am feeling a little uncomfortable because my completely natural, normal and healthy OBSESSION with High School Musical is reaching new levels of inappropriatey.  And all because of this:

DAMN you, Zac Efron!!!

I remained totally ambivalent to your aww shucks snuggliness on that horrible/amazing TV show, Summerland.

Although, I am sure that BOTH of us realized that every time you and that piggesque girl were kissing/hugging that the camera would focus ONLY on you and your sunny wholesomeness.

And when my friends were fawning over you in HSM, I was yawning.

Just look at you with your little sports-posse of FFA's (Future Faggots of America.)

And then these pictures of you and your co-star/girlfriend on vacation in Hawaii surfaced:

(Insert bent-over/doggy-style references here)

And my icy heart, as well as my loins, melted.
It is sooo precious that you are going out with little Miss Latasian in real life! Also, when did you grow a body?

After this onslaught of shirtless beach romping with your half Asian/half Latina girlfriend/beard, how could I resist all your perky charms?

I went to see Hairspray directly thereafter.

And *maybe* I bought the sound track just for your rendition of 'Ladies Choice.'

Zac, Zac, Zac. Why do I love thee so?

Could it be your devout love for Women of Size?
Could it be that you have accepted and chosen a half Asian lady to be your pet?
Could it be your conscious decision to make the cinematic genre of the 'Musicals' your forte?
OR
Is it just that you (very possibly) could actually be gay and fellow gays are always eager to embrace and fantasize about their famous fellows in faggotry?

WTF-ever. Just keep on frolicking half-naked and I'll be satisfied.
Oh, and for godssake, make sure your are wearing sunscreen to protect your delicate peachy skin!

Comments

[Angela Lovell]

Miss Latino-Asian fusion better eat some cheeseburgers if she hopes to keep Zac interested. Or he'll just keep pulling on his penis in public beach photos, hoping for some sort of stimulation to occur.

[Alex Ferrando]

Looking at these photos, all I can think of is a threesome with Zac Effron and Daniel Radcliffe. I'm just puttin' the idea out there.